How do i tolerate myself today?

How do I tolerate myself today?

How do I tolerate my unusual urges,

My lack of conviction,

My strange dereliction for sexual gratification,

And dissociative meanderings on this app

On this website

With this cup of tea

With this thought about this thought about him

About him when he is like that

Or when he is not,

Feeling like, ‘why the fuck should I tolerate this?’

Feeling ignored.

Oh, hang on. I’m being a dick. Silly, foolish, wanting strokes

Wanting hugs, someone to give me the thumbs up.

It’s ok, I’m alright, I’m alright.

Man, how do I tolerate myself today?